I'm back. 

i'm juz so overworked..

next week.. busiest schedule i've ever had..

MONDAY
chemistry test..
3 freaking chapters to study!!!
like how the hell am i goin to study when i'm goin jamming tml..

TUESDAY
physics practical exam..
good luck khad..
hope u survive this..

WEDNESDAY
X-COUNTRY!!!!!!!
wah lau.....................................
so lazy ah...................
still muz run..
the worst part is..
its straight after skol..
still got lessons..
damn........

THURSDAY
band auditions..
i hope we make it thru..
i'll sing my best..
sing sing sing..
i hope we get picked..
we had better..
tml we're goin to jam..
my baby's coming along too..
yay yay!! so sori by..
realli wanted to spend the day out wid u..
so sorrrriiii.......

FRIDAY
chemistry practical exam..
when are all these exams and tests goin to be over??!!!!
argh......
hurry hurry.. get done and over wid..

SATURDAY!!!!
finally..............
i dun haf to give tuition anymore..
so tired adi..
time for a break..
and not forgetting..
STUDY!!!

SUNDAY!!!!!!!!!
i wanna try ur cooking by!!!!!
my weekend's for u...........
try my best to avoid any plans aite...
heeehhheeee

*****on top of all this... i still haf to stay back for malay dance.. for chinese new year.. like everyday.. not forgetting the proposal i still owe my malay teacher for planning the inter-college event. damn.. so slack.. and still.. practicing for the band also.. wah lau... AND i still haf homeworks and studies to follow up.. and MY BOYFRIEND to attend too!!!!*****

see wat a busy woman i am...
hehehehehe...
and i still seem to haf time for everything else..
like blogging.. hehe..

smth he did for me..

some guys know how to steal a woman's heart away.... especially when the lady is angry..

This is for you, Joyce. 

Much respect to my scanner 'cause I didn't know it could do this to my sketches. 

I thought about the conversation we had yesterday. You gotta know that all the stuff I bought for you comes right straight from my heart first rather from my wallet. Know that spending on you is not just what I want because I wanna give you more love that is IN ME. Know that you should not worry about the competition. You have already won it a long time ago when our eyes first met because there is nothing better than my passion for soccer except you. I love you always.

juz when i need him.. he disappeared..

well i had a bad day today..
wasnt in the mood to talk..
but i do miss him.. and i do love him..
and how am i goin to tell u dis when u slp already..
so i'm goin to blog dis..
maybe u'll see this tml morning..
maybe u wont..
anyways..

abt the reason why u dint tell me abt wat happened btwn u and ana..
i know i shldnt make dis a huge subject..
but i'm still unhappy..
wat'd u mean it isnt important..
if the conversation is so trivial..
den wat abt all those tings i oways talk to u abt..
arent they all the same?
juz as unimportant..
juz as trivial..
den during our conversations at nite..
dere wont be anything to talk abt rite..
i'd be the only one talking and u listening..
reason? because nth is important enuf for me to know..
i'll haf to ask the qns..
i cld be pouring my whole boring life story out..
wid u on the other side "listening"
reason: oh.. u're conquering the conversation, by.. i'll juz listen..
so den wat wld smth be important to u,
that u wld tell me?
and when wld that be..
and since i heard it from her mouth and not yours..
its different..
cos u're my bf not her..
i'd expect more from u..
and wat abt dose phonecalls without a goodbye..
rude.. u cut phonecalls as if u cant wait to get rid of me..
this is getting irrtating, by..
i cant stand dis..
if u wont tell me anything until i ask u..
we mite as well not talk at all..

when everyday becomes a tedious workout, i'm starting to wonder i even bother to make tings rite..

it hit me HARD.. painful realisation..
that.. in life.. we are NOT BORN FREE...
there is no such ting as free will..
dere is no such ting as being free..
we wld nv be free from problems,
illness, sorrows..
we are brought to life in an environment
not of our choice..
if we had free will?
we can choose where to live..
choose our parents..
choose our life de way we want it to be..
it'd be perfect.. we wldnt be complaining..
if we had a choice,
we wld haf been able to change the past..
correct mistakes..
stop the unwanted..
however.. in this world we live in..
we are bound, by rules, laws that govern our lives..
we are made to think
that we are free.. the environment we live in
made us believe that we haf a choice..
freedom of speech..
free to speak our mind..
but is it always true?
and when we want something to happen,
smth to be done,
does it always go our way?

in conclusion..
i'd been enlightened..
that all of us..
are not born free..
the fantasy of being able to decide everything..
will always remain a reflection in the mirror..
choices, wishes, demands..
they dun always come true..
it is rather disappointing..
to know how much the reality can hurt..
we all believe in our rights to make choices..
to decide who we want to be..
but is it reali how life works.....?


















i've been having a tiring week..
i'm so worn out..
today was frustrating..
teaching her felt like teaching a stubborn mule..
yes i understand.. bla bla bla..
a few minutes later..
how to do this question again ah?
sigh..
my adeq also another problem..
her fren came over..
serious dose of attitude problem..
u see.. she's got a whole head of super long hair..
being the curious people we are..
we juz had to enquire..
and that snobbish 15 yr old..
was combing her hair..
and throwing the stray strands down on my house floor..
i saw wat she did and she acted as if its her house..
she dint even bother picking them up!!
and de way she talk to my sister..
so vulgar!!! i juz kip quiet only..
my sister is supposed to teach her...
and dere she was acting like a princess scolding my sis back..
first impression of her was bad..
stuck up young girl..
her freaking hp was so damn bloody noisy..
wat a watever she is..
i cannot be bother to label her..

and i haven even done my own skol work...
damn.. i'm so way lagging..
need to stop giving tuition i tink..
i dunno..
maybe i shld..
aiyo... and that woman ah..
so impatient abt my kitten!!!!
i feel like juz shuffing the kitten down her throat and say..
"nah!! give u adi.. satisfied now..?"
hai.. so frustrating la...........
the kitten not even 1 mth old...
haiyo......

and my sister again..
so rude!!!
no manners.. talk like as if she damn big ah..
feel like slapping her mouth..
talk like minah..
in front of her fren act very big ah..
scold here scold dere..
wah lau.......................

and that bloody woman..
for goodness sake..
i cannot hang out wid her for long..
i'll go mad...
seriously..
she's juz the type of fren..
that is juz a fren..
nth more than that..
she's got a big mouth anyway..
cannot tahan her...
maybe i shld stop giving her tuition from next month onwards..
very hard to teach..
i'm overworking myself..
i need to let loose..



tired..
tired..
tired..







and i miss my baby..
miss you..

Yusof yusof.. 

Lets Get Stooopid

Forgettin' Singapore have made new money out of plastic, I smoothen my crumpled $10 note by ironin' 'em.. Now it's crumpled forever!

I'm gettin' it. Uh huh. Uh huh. Yeah. Yeah. 

I haven't been very creative lately. Wastin' time gettin' pimples.  

There Is No Title To This Post

I'm so freakin' bored and lazy.

Cikgu, Diyanah, Hamzah and me 

post post post!!!! wahahahaha..

long time no blog!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
warghahahahaha...
i'm goin mad..
lots of stuff in my head..
been busy wid skol lately..
gawd..
I MISS MY BOYFRIEND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hehehehe.. ;P
oopss.. i'm not good at being discrete..
busy busy busy..
work work work..
somebody KILL ME NOW!!!!!
den my family can haf $20 000 in insurance for my death..
hehehehe..
save me from my a'levels!!!
somebody save me now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hahahahaha..
okie i'm lame..
anyways..
straight out..
i'm goin insane..
retarded..
wid all the tings i've been learning in skol..
sigh..
all the best for my future..
i'm aiming for A's, people!!!
university..
i wanna grab that degree..
oh oh!! did i mentioned that i miss my boyfriend?




























oh oh!! did i ??
or did i forgot to say i love him??
oh..... that annoying, loose-brained, peanut head, curly-haired, tanned
tall skinny irritating bamboo



i call my boyfriend..
heheheheh...










oh oh!!! i tink i forgot to tell him i miss him...
oh dear..



anyways....




yea.. hehehehe...
love u by..
miss u too...
u peanut head curly haired tall tanned skinny(getting fatter now) wid those long flickering eyelashes of yours that just irritates me annoying whiney watever watever
beloved boyfriend of mine..
hehehehehe..
i still love you..

my poor darling..

finally managed to use the computer..
finally can blog..
sigh.. trying to finish my hw..
tired tired..
cant complain much can i..
cos in the long run,
i'll be the one who'll benefit from all this..
studying is still way much better den working..
doin the same stuff everyday..
it wld kinda get boring sooner or later..
cant stand boredom..
anyways.. here's wat've been happening lately..






got myself a bit more intellectual dis days..
the new bunch of gp teachers are great..
i finally understood how to write the introduction for gp essays..
thanks Mrs Biswas..
it isnt like secondary skol compos..
where ur intro is like a story..
gp is way harder..
ever heard of argumentative essays?
the ones that english teachers always wans u to stay away from?
the harder ones?
gp is smth like that..
but more profound..
and indepth..
it concerns our daily life..
it concerns everything around us..
wid gp, we learn wat is reali the truth and make our own judgments..
it teaches us to question..
hahahaha..
it isnt an easy subject to score..
but all the more..
it reali woke me up..
learnt that social studies was propaganda..
the media is full of bullshit..
and things arent always as they turn out to be..
been so into the subject lately..
that i was thinking of becoming a lawyer as a future job prospect..
the risks are great..
the opportunities very few..
it aint easy either..
but either ways.. nothing is ever easy in life..
gotta work for it..
but it'll be an interesting career..
hopefully a stable one..
anyways.. dats much later..
now its all abt a'levels..
pressure..
only the first week of skol..
so much pressure..
sigh...
cant lose myself in the temptation of laziness..
cant lose track of my studies..
gotta work hard this year..




















i'm so sori baby..
been very busy lately..
cant reali spend much time..
and i'm tired most of the time..
will spend my sundays wid u..
poor darling..
love you..

F**K YOU EVERYBODY!! F**K YOU!!

the thing is, no, i'm going temasek polytechnic.. i'm intending to go there once i get back my results.. taking up vsc which is visual communication.. yeah.. gotta go back to school on monday to settle my portfolios for interviews and stuff...... had a conversation with an old friend today.. not exactly that old.. adele john's her name.. she's mixed.. half chinese, half indian or as i would like to call it 'chindian'.. she saw something in school today.. it was my table.. a lot of stuff was on it.. as in drawings and shit.. heh.. i doodled her name on one part.. decorated nicely according to her.. she didn't get to see the other table though.. i drew her face.. yeah.. so anyways, she saw it.. as one thing leads to another, we then started to talk about the past.. started asking questions like how long did i like her and stuff.. then she apologized for rejecting me and carefully, i mean carefully explain to me why she did that.. then we talk about school and where we would go after secondary school.. yeah.. as you can see, i've obviously moved on, moved on with a girl in my life now that i truly love very much...... met up with coach later on.. we talked about the players, the team, the dinner and the upcoming tournament.. well basically the future of salem fire football.. admire him a lot.. used to have grudges with him for not respecting my other talents.. i'm over it now.. tried to understand his perspectives on that matter...... now at home still figuring out how to have an early application to temasek polytechnic.. trying not to stress myself with it 'cause the last time i did that, i made her angry.. so yeah...... i miss you lah, by.. why aren't you answering my calls?? kesian tau shalih.. tengok macam shalih sorang je lah yang akan post2 sekarang.. by ngah sibuk dengan sekolah pe.. a levels semue.. sigh...... heard that they had an agreement or something.. that's good lah.. 'cause like what i've said, i'm in the tight middle spot.. and it's very hard for me...... so anyways, mohamed fahrurazi bin masnawi, bestfriends since kindergarten and forever will be.. haven't been connecting with him nowadays.. he got his own friends now.. having fun and stuff.. just wanted to write the following here as he no longer visits my blog.. it's not that i'm gay or what, heh, but i keep thinking about you.. i've been looking after you like a big brother like the way i look down at your house from my house! heh.. but of course there are something that i can't do like stopping you from picking up the habits.. smoking etc.. got an advise from my mum.. "that's his life.. you can't do anything about it.." yeah.. i guess so.. i've always been looking after you.. that's why i'm t-bone and you're razor.. that's why i'm batman and you're robin.. heh.. nonsensical memories.. must admit that most of the time i keep pangseh-ing you.. play soccer never call you.. go out never call you.. heh.. actually i USED TO call you remember? but most of the time you can't make it.. so i got used to it and i didn't call you anymore.. oh and did you know? that the only way to connect with you recently is through joshua, firdaus, syahid and who else i can't remember.. cause you're closer to them now.. connect as in, know what have you been doing and all.. drink and stuff.. haha.. I KNOW! ...... i have never backstab you until recently, pasal khadijah.. yeah...... guess we're even! You tried to woo dee and aq.. ah ah ah.. hehe.. i was cool.. yeah.. but i try not to make it even lah, 'cause it's not a game.. bleargh...... just to let you know that i'm still here if you need me.. we've stopped telling problems.. yeah, i know.. your mind set of 'trust no one'! heh.. i also know that i've let the cat out of the bag many times.. giving the impression that you have a big mouth.. i mean you do literally.. haha! just kidding.. REALLY!! just kidding.. i just recalled! you keep asking me, 'asyik marah je..' everytime we were walking.. 'cause i like to give this serious look on my face.. hahahaha.. so yeah.. sorry for the sidetrack.. as i was saying, i'm here for you always.. not bad of having an italian defence on your side, eh? heh.. okay...... like what you always say which is carved on my heart, friends forza!!!! i mean forever.. remember that! yeah.. tomorrow got training, YOUR FACE WILL COME!?? hahahaha.. so yeah.. i've let it all out, not all of it though since i got nothing to do whattt.. now lets do a survey.. does the title suits the post? (yes) (maybe) (a bit lah) (not at all!) (fuck this 'survey') please kindly tag your answers at the left hand side of the blog.. thank you.. hur hur hur..
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damn i'm lame..

i'm whacked..

juz completed making our new skin..
kinda kewl dis time..
no lovey dovey stuff..
which is great too..
anyways..
tml got skol..
darn..
1st day..
how i wish i was back in primary skol..
1st day no need to do anything..
*sigh*
wat to expect tml..
a whole lot of admin stuff..
orientation stuff for jc1s..
watever watever..
i'm beat..
whacked..
shagged..
wont be blogging so often dese days..
wont be seeing much of HIM either..
gonna start hating skol..
gonna start wishing i'm having the hols..
but anyways..
everything has an ending..
and everything has a beginning..
so tml's another chapter in my storybook..
skol live..
back in cjc..
cant wait to see all the stuck-up little kiddos
who tink their parents own the entire skol..
who TRIES oh so hard to defy the skol rules..
forget it..
cjc is stricter den any other bloody jc..
even the best jc arent so strict..
gawd.. welcome back to cj in a few hours time..
gonna slp now..
till the next time i blog peeps..
dun miss me!!! hehehehehe..
gd nite!!!

Impressive 126

You're starting school school already.. Man, I'm gonna miss you.. It feels like I'm gonna lose you.. You're gonna be pretty busy making the grades.. Just don't try to forget me.. If you do, I'm gonna DIG YOUR EYEBALLS OUT AND FEED IT TO THE CROWS! Just kidding.. Hehe..

Anyways, went down to the void deck to do some juggling.. Did an impressive 126.. Unfortunately, the ball went to the drain and then to ANOTHER.. Meaning it was impossible to get it out.. So there goes an SF ball.. Apologized to coach, promising I would train harder.. Gosh, what a way to make up for the stupid ball.. Bleargh..

So where should I go?? On the list are Catholic Junior College, Nanyang Polytechnic, Singapore Polytechnic, Temasek Polytechnic, Laseille (College of Arts) and ITE Bish...... forget about the last one.. I wanna be smart, I'll do anything to be smart.. I wanna draw, I mean drawing is my life! Waaa.. I really need suggestions.. Kak, this is where you come in, okay?

Leaving a quote on Education..

All love shifts and changes.. I don't know if you can be wholeheartedly in love all the time..
Julie Andrews